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Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Christmastime in India

     I've been a major slacker in keeping everyone informed of all the latest adoption news.  I really hate blog posts that are nothing but words, and blah blah blah, more delays, boring, boring, tear, sniffle.  I want to be posting pictures and videos of my adorable boy and all the fun things we're doing together and the progress he's making and how I'm the luckiest mom in the world.  But, the sad truth is that's not where we are yet. 

     I do have some super, happy, exciting, pinch me cause I'm dreaming kind of news, though!
Chris and I are leaving for India on December 26th, and we will meet Holden for the very first time on December 28th!!!  We will only have two days to spend with him before returning home, but we're determined to make the most of those two days together. 

     This super happy news does not at all correspond with progress on the adoption bureaucracy front.  We've had two court dates so far (I think just two... I'm losing track because frankly, I just don't really care anymore.  Until they tell me some real news, they can have a court date every day of the week for all I care.)  We have another date scheduled for December 14th, but apparently, our agency already knows that the verbal order from the judge (you know, the one that finalizes the adoption and is basically the last big thing we're waiting for.... that ORDER) will not happen until after the New Year.  After we get the verbal order, we have to wait for a written order (because for some reason, it's not possible to talk and write at the same time....?) and THEN... it will be about two months to get Holden's passport.  Once we have his passport, it's GO TIME!!  Then we can schedule our trip to bring him home for good. 

     So... all that to say, the timeframe to bring Holden home has moved to March at the very earliest, likely April, and to be honest, as long as we bring him home before his third birthday in October, I'll be thrilled. 

     All of these delays are as we expected, so we're mostly taking them in stride.  I no longer wait on the edge of my seat the day after a court date.  I just go about my day and if we get good news, we get good news.  If not, I'm not gonna sweat it because there's absolutely nothing I can do about it.  There are two other families adopting little ones from the same orphanage, and they are on the exact same timeline as us.  Court date after court date.  In a sense it's kind of reassuring to know we're not the only ones playing this waiting game.  At least they're not looking at all of our info going, "I don't  know about these two.... maybe they're not cut out for this...."  It's just the typical India adoption process. 

     So why the December trip?  The December trip is really just an extra. bonus trip so that Chris can meet his little boy before he goes on an extended cruise vacation in the tropics :)   That's right, it's gonna be all swim trunks and flippy floppies!  I'm so jealous....
     (I'm joking, in case you didn't get that last part...  I did have a guy on the phone ask me recently, "Ohhh, your husband's a pilot? What does he fly?  I mean, do you know what he flies?" 
"No, dude, I'm such a blithering idiot I have no idea what aircraft my husband flies every day... I mean, who cares as long as he looks cute in his flight suit and I can get a manicure and my "hair did" every  month.....  SERIOUSLY, dude?  seriously?!"
     We now know with confidence that I will be bringing Holden home by myself and swinging it single mom style for a while.  We knew this could be a very real possibility.  It's cool.  We got this.  No biggie.  Military wives do this every day.  (I know, we're pretty tough and awesome like that.  Ok, not me, I really haven't proven myself yet, but I'm determined to make it out alive and be a stronger person for it.)  Our agency and Holden's orphanage have been so kind to help us schedule this extra trip.  We will be forever grateful for this.  My work has also been incredibly kind in giving me an abundance of time off of work so we can make this trip happen and I can spend some much needed time with Chris before he leaves for vacation :)  And, I have to mention Chris' work here too.  Really, they approved a last minute trip to India when the squadron is so incredibly busy?!  Chris works with a group of amazing men.  Really, we're so blessed to be part of our squadron.  Also, I should mention that I'm not actually bringing Holden home completely by myself.  My incredibly awesome Dad, who is already the best grandpa in the world to five other little kiddos, will be coming with me on this final trip to India to bring Holden home.  Also, as a military wife, you never really have to raise your kids "by yourself".  I have some amazing, dear friends who are like family to me, and we'll all be getting through deployments together.  Don't cry for me, guys.  I'll be crying enough on my own. You've got to be the ones shaking me, saying, "Pull it together, woman!  You are a MOM now!!!"

     In other disappointing news.  Until we have the verbal order from the judge, we can't post Holden's pics and videos on this blog or on facebook.  So if you're my buddy, I'll be sending you an email with pics and videos from the trip, but nothing will be posted online until sometime after the New Year.  I know... major suckage... I'm pretty bummed about this, but we're so close, I don't want to do anything to mess things up. 

     That's all the news for now.  I'm sure I'll have a lot more to say in 17 days!!!